When someone asks me why I decided to become a Christian, it’s really easy to give a simple and sweet version of my testimony. I may have even given the reader’s digest version of my salvation to some of you! Sometimes, it’s easier. It’s definitely less humbling. I have convinced myself of all kinds of things in order to avoid sharing boldly about who I was before I became a Christian and how I struggled to follow him even after I made the decision. Especially in Asia when I’m trying to put Jesus in the warmest light possible, I temporarily convinced myself that I should share my story in a really upbeat, thumbs up kind of way. But that’s not the meat of my story.
Recently, I’ve had several opportunities to share, upfront and real, about my walk with God. And it’s been amazing.
Last week, Skittles and I met with Helen, a girl who has some real pain in her life. After her dad had several affairs, her mom retaliated in the same fashion, and Helen walked away feeling the sting of unfaithfulness and the shallowness of uncommitted love. Helen basically resigned to it; speaking of her own future she said, “I guess I would be okay if my husband cheated on me. You know, maybe if he didn’t bring the girls around or something. I suppose I would make it ok.”
When my own parents separated, I went through a lot of the same feelings that she did: pressure, guilt, resignation to abusive love. Helen’s boyfriend designs graphics for computer games, and in his free time, sends pornographic sketches of Japanese anime to Helen.
Because of my own testimony and because the Holy Spirit enabled me, I was able to talk kindly, gently, and without the awkward tone of inexperience about sexual sin. This was the first time Helen had really talked with anyone about this kind of stuff.
In case you’re wondering, I’m the rotten apple. Before I started to follow God wholeheartedly, I was headed for certain death. Looking someone in the eye and saying, “I’m a sinner who was headed for hell, but God saved me, healed me, and He is doing amazing things with my life now,” is the most freeing, truthful thing I have ever said to someone.
As I’ve gotten to say that very thing to several friends over the last week, please join me in asking God that they would really take it to heart, that they would just choose him, that they would find his healing power and love to be true in their lives too. Especially pray for: Helen, Wang Qing, Flora, and Polly. Also, please continue asking for Blue Coral and Yvonne’s salvation!
I feel so blessed that God is redeeming the ugly things from my past for His glory. My life really does belong to Him, and He can use it however He wants! Thanks for letting me share all that with you.
=) God bless you all!!
Autumn